Head above water....

Not a good start to today.

I woke up with no cell phone access.  The thing I count on most. It's a terrible game of figuring out what to pay and when and hoping beyond hope that I make it to the next unemployment check. It is not a proud moment for me. It is becoming clearer and clearer that some drastic changes need to be made. Like....giving notice on my apartment. (Deep breath!!). 

As I've said before, this isn't going to be easy.  I can't imagine living with someone else.  Right now I at once enjoy and despise my solitude.  But when I am working, there is nothing better than coming home and not having anyone around and being by myself. That is why I hesitate to give it up.  I keep thinking that the right opportunity is right around the corner and if I give up my place it's like throwing in the towel that it will happen for me. Silly, right?  I keep saying to myself that I will give it a few more months, but it is looking like it may only be a few weeks or just one more month instead.

Keeping my head above water isn't easy, I try to remain positive and calm, and not let it get me down as much as I used too. But it is truly a humbling experience being unemployed and I continue to see just how much strength I have in myself.  I am tested everyday, and every night when I go to sleep I am happy to be in my bed with a roof over my head....and I am thankful.

Today I am just going to keep busy and organize my books, tomorrow I have Juan in the morning and Thursday I will tackle all the paperwork organization.  I find it is good to have a plan and keep myself busy, otherwise I'd just go bonkers!! 

Heather